Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize