You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
