i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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