Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
