I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
