I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
