No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
is wine microwaveable?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
