This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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