Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
