I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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