I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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