The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
