what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
