just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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