and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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