I love having hate sex.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
