There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
the room spins SO much faster in panama
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
