Fine. I'll sleep in my office
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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