One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize