Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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