How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
