I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
