Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
