Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
