Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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