Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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