The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Randomize