i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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