i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I'm sobbing to NWA
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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