so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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