brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Me. At least after what I've been through.
my shit smells like andre
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
