So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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