ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
