My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
