haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
