The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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