so explain again why im purple
no
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
how do you play pong handcuffed?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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