I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
