Welp...herpes.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
