So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
