im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
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