5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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