it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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