Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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