at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She bit a glass in half.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
