...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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