The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
