I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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