My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
