not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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