He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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